In the land of the Free ?

In The Land of the Free?

   At 8:34Am Pacific standard time the Home Land security satellite picked up early morning activity coming from the “NW quadrant” just above the 45^th parallel, instantly the long range “Cannon D-69000’ whirred into action aided by the body heat signatures. Click, click, click the Zoom lens rapidly focused on the objective “45H by87L”.

Meanwhile on the ground somewhere in Nevada in the office of “Home Land Security” The alarm on the satellite computer monitor began to Beep , all eyes  focused on the large Plasma screen  as the  “G.W. Bush Weapons of Mass Destruction Satellite 2” camera focused on its earthly objective. Simultaneously  In Portland Oregon, the  S.W.A.T division of H.L.S were alerted,  within seconds helmets were strapped , Velcro fastened, guns locked and loaded ,engines roared into life in the carefully disguised “Brown UPS Truck” and rubber  tires burned  towards objective 45H by 87L…it was 8:35 AM….

 Back At the office of Homeland security objective 45H by 87L came into view…..”Bloody Hell! Not those two again…false alarm, false alarm” Uttered “Arthur Bush” George’s distant cousin from Cleveland. Why is that those two are the only neighbors’ in America that talk face to face, God I thought we had it set up that people only communicated via computer and cell phones  so that we could monitor their existence, Hell! Only terrorists talk in person anymore so that we can’t track them... Arthur exclaimed!!!!

Moments earlier at 8:32AM Pacific Standard Time at objective 45L by 87L totally oblivious to “Big Brother”, Wilson sat quietly behind “The great wall of North Vietnam” ( His bamboo covered sun shade on his deck )surveying the world outside hmmmmm he thought, no one to harass yet. Then a door opened upstairs followed by the quick steps of boots as they descended the concrete stairs to the Wilson level. Ah! Prey he thought…ok, wait until he’s at his motorcycle and the Irishman’s hands are dirty...

“Hey” called Wilson to The Irish man in tights carefully removing the fuel pump out of his motorcycle tank. “Hey Moron” called back “Robin Hood”!!.......and thus began the daily banter between Breckenridge apartment’s town criers.…….

Meanwhile at 8:36am a mouse Farted in Iraq and all hell broke loose at the Office of Homeland Security.

At Portland University- class room D27- Robin hoods wife “Marion G Hood” sitting in seat 7A next to the disgruntled underpaid janitor from “Roberts property management” called Bob (who had a deodorant problem) wondered if the people sitting behind her noticed the crack in her hair - wished she had declared Saturday bad hair day and worn her black base ball cap complete with her broad happy Argentinean smile!!!! Instead of her current “I hope they don’t notice my crack look”. But She had nothing to worry about as the people behind were just as bored and while some slept others played space invaders on their cells letting home land security know that all was well in Portland.

 ”Good Morning America! Its Saturday November 14…. 8:37AM Pacific Standard Time… How’s she cuttin!!” boomed “Sean Flaherty” The Irish Dj On “WKLS Portland” from the radio in the muffin man’s apartment #B207 as he arose to bake a fresh batch of blueberry delights…. and a new day in “Security Conscious America” Began!!!

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